Mother's Day Memories

squinty eyes and ice cream cones

The last Mother's Day with my mom before she passed away was in 2000. I was a senior in high school in Florida. My first mother's day as a mother was in 2006. I was in my mid-twenties living in California. Sadly, I don't remember exactly what I did during those special milestones in my life. I forgot to write down what we ate for breakfast. The kind words that were spoken. My thoughts and feelings of the day. I'm sure there were pictures taken, but who knows where they are? 

Sometimes it's the biggest events that I forget to write down. It's hard to write about amount major moments with restraint. It's so easy to get overly sentimental and suddenly the words lose their strength. The small details like the the color of the flowers on the kitchen table, the way I wore my hair, and the exact cloud formations in the sky get lost under all the emotions.   

This year, even though it's just an ordinary Mother's Day (my 6th!), I hope to take a minute to write down the details of the day in a journal. Perhaps, it will be fun for me to look back years from now and have a glimpse into my life in 2012, 30-years-old, 3 young kids, 1 great husband.  It would be a shame to have another Mother's Day go by and fade away in my memory. I've already let that happen too many times. I would give anything to relive Mother's Day in 2000 or 2006. I could got back in time (sort of) if only I had one small journal entry. It would have been so easy for me! I won't let that happen again. 

How will you remember this Mother's Day? Do you keep a record of major events in your life? Or do you think it's better to just enjoy the moment and move on? No matter how you decide to do it, I wish you the best Mother's Day! 

PS Some of my favorite posts about motherhood:

LOVE this quote about Motherhood

Celebrating Mother's Day with Girlfriends

My motherhood vacation in NYC

My motherhood vacation in Paris 

Pictures of my first two years as a mom.

Mother's Day 2011 I forgot I wrote about it! Yay! Makes me wonder if I sift through some old journals, I might be able to find 2000 and 2006 after all :)

Best Mother's Day Ever

Mother's Day seems forced to me. There's always a nervous energy my house that day. Everyone has to be nice to mom! No fighting! Make her breakfast! Clean the dishes! Isn't she so special?! WE LOVE YOU!!!!

Ok. Thanks everyone. I know you do and I love you too. I feel it all year. But today you're all making me squirm.

And I always miss my mom on Mother's Day. Last week I was in Central Park looking at everyone walking by Bethesda's Terrace. There had to be hundreds and hundreds of people visiting the park. I would trade anything to have one of them be my mom. There's so many people on this planet and none quiet fill the hole my mom left in my heart. Mother's day reminds me of that hole. Makes me sad.

After trying to make this day work for so many years, Rob thought of an idea to make this the best Mother's Day everrr. I shouldn't be, but I'm always surprised when he does something that shows he knows me better than anyone. Like last Christmas he bought me a copy of Bad Feminist. I almost cried at his thoughtfulness. It was so good. And last week, he knew I needed to escape all this Mother's Day madness. I never said I needed to be shipped out, but that's exactly what he did. He surprised me with plane tickets to Puerto Rico. He left the hotel reservations up to me because he knew I would want to pick one. And he bought travel insurance just in case I thought it was a terrible idea and wanted to cancel. I thought that was a sweet gesture. But there was noway I was going to cancel.

So I woke up at 6am on Mother's Day, skipped breakfast, threw on my backpack, squeezed my family and said goodbye. I caught the train to Newark International Airport and was off to Puerto Rico by myself. I arrived starving in Old San Juan five hours later. The next three days were spent exploring, eating, relaxing, and even missing my family. It felt wonderful.

I would have never thought of flying away from my family on Mother's Day. It's seems rude, even sacrilegious. But for the first time in 15 years, I'm looking forward to next Mother's Day. I wonder where Rob will ship me next time.

Photos to follow.

Last Minute Mother's Day Flowers

Eeeek. I totally forgot to post about the flowers I received from BloomNation for Mother's Day. But I'm sure I'm not the only one procrastinating this time of year. If you haven't picked up a Mother's Day gift, flowers are the perfect option. I ordered this Floral Heights bouquet on Wednesday night and it arrived the next afternoon. I love it.

BloomNation can be described as the Etsy of flowers. It has that same personal, handmade feel as well as the benefit of supporting local businesses. The only flaw is that like Etsy, it has a few stellar designers mixed with mediocre ones. I went through and picked out some of my favorites. Hopefully there's a cool florist featured on the site in your area. If so, use coupon code Bloom20 for an extra 20% off.

San Francisco: $75 Wild Romance

Burlingame, CA: $145 Garden

Denver: $40 Soft Rose Arrangement

Raleigh, NC: $65 Laurel and Lace

Huntington Beach: $59 Jacobs

Atlanta: $95 Blue Paradise

Los Alamitos: $80 Vintage Bouquet 2
I also adore this option to create a custom arrangement. You choose a local florist you like, set the price, describe the kinds of flowers you prefer, and even upload a few pictures to inspire the florist. Next time I'm doing that!

Thanks BloomNation for the sending me the arrangement :)

Flower arrangements from years past: Valentine's 2013, Valentine's Day 2012, Mother's Day 2011. Every year they get better!

I love arrangements that feel like a scavenger hunt. Where from every angle I find surprising flowers I wouldn't expect. Keep reading to see a bagillion pictures of my Mother's Day bouquet . . .

Mother's Day Recap 2013

nov. 18, 2007. in one of the first anthropologie items i ever bought. you can't see it in this picture, but there were tulips growing on my boobs! ha i loved that cardigan. 

The day before Mother's Day, Rob and I went on a date. We decided to go to Chelsea Market for dinner, but first I wanted to stop by Anthropologie. Just to peek in for a minute to get a new dress for Mother's Day. He found a giant flowery couch to sit on while I shopped. I didn't find anything on the first floor, so I walked down stairs to their basement level.

I took my time looking through the racks of clothes. I asked the salesgirl when they closed. I had an hour. I tried on a few dresses, looked through a few books, and checked to see if they had my size in sweaters I really didn't like. Nothing stood out to me in the entire store besides the blue dress I was holding. Everything else looked gaudy. The overly embellished sweaters. The patchwork chairs. The over sized necklaces. Ruffles in odd places. The kind of wallpaper I loved and bought 3 years ago. 

Then a I started listening to a song they had playing in the background. The chorus had something about moms. Mine died in 2000 when I was 18 years old (i try not to bring this up in every single conversation ha). The singer sounded like Jack Johnson, so mellow and sad. I looked around the store and remembered that when I was 18 years old, these were exactly the clothes I thought were so fabulously feminine and so me. I still remember the day my dad tossed an Anthropologie catalog at me and said, "Here, this looks like you." To my teenage self, I took it as a massive compliment. I was yearning to have the same style as women in the catalog and I was thrilled that someone noticed. I had yet to purchase anything from the store, but I held onto the catalogs for inspiration. This went on even into my 20's when I could finally afford to splurge on a few things.

But now as I was standing next to a belted zebra print dress and that same damn guy was singing about his mom, I started to cry. I realized there's almost nothing the same about me when my mother was alive. I've somewhat abandoned or outgrown that person. While there's still parts about me that are the same--my love for writing, my appetite for food, my messy bedroom, there's something sad knowing she never got to see me evolve. Not just in my ridiculous fashion choices, but in becoming an adult. I'm sure she would have been different over these last 13 years, too. I would have loved to see her retire, become a social media guru, and turn into a grandma. It always comes down to that for me. She never missed out on anything. She was always present. It's so annoying she didn't get to live a few more decades.  

Finally the song ended before anyone noticed me crying. I checked my phone to see what time it was, which led to me checking my Instagram. And with tears in my still in eyes, the first picture to show up was  Rob with this caption: Been sitting on this couch for the last hour. Sharon said she was going to try something on and never came back. If you see my wife please tell her I am still waiting for her on that couch in Anthropologie.

And completely by accident, he got me out of my funk. I walked back upstairs, bought the blue dress, and we went out for dinner. I didn't mention my meltdown immediately, but I did put in a request for more self portraits from him in the future. There's nothing like an awful selfie to make it all better. 

Mother's Day Breakfast

While I was out shopping with Ella yesterday, Rob scrubbed the entire house. Then he started writing his twenty minute speech for church. This took him until 11pm. When I was taking a shower, he said, "You're not going to get all sad about not getting flowers and breakfast in bed tomorrow, right? Because I cleaned the house and you got a new dress." Without me saying anything, he knew my answer. I was still in the shower when he came back with all the mother's day essentials: pastry, chocolates, card, and flowers. There are a million reasons why NYC makes life difficult, but the 24 hr bakeries/flower shops two blocks away are awesome. Thanks for making my morning so special and for giving me a break to write this post on my new surprise Mother's Day computer! 

Rob made me put these pictures up of my new dress. I think it's too self indulgent. But what else are blogs for? 

Mother's Day Gift Idea: Cool Sunglasses from Lookmatic

This post is sponsored by Lookmatic. I've been pining for a new pair of sunglasses ever since I went to Philly, remember? When Lookmatic contacted me to write about their glasses, I jumped at the chance. I adore their frames. Wouldn't it be the perfect Mother's Day gift?

The weather was perfect and the location couldn't have been more beautiful from my impromptu Lookmatic photo shoot. With Rob as my photographer, I did all the modeling poses I learned from the cruise, only to discover my genuine efforts were hilarious to my kids. They tried everything to put my ego back in check. Ella couldn't stop giggling at me and giving me bunny ears. The boys kept making funny noises and sneaking their heads into the pictures. I finally gave up and just played with them. Even if my kids weren't letting me have the sophisticated fashion shoot I was hoping for, I still adore the pictures. My sunglasses gave me the cool factor, while my kids gave me the wow factor. Love those knuckle heads.

I love the picture above. It's the exact moment I gave up my modeling career. 

love this picture of me, but not so much of ella. haha look who's laughing now.

I chose the Marlowe frame because of it's unusual shape. I've never worn such a round frame--I was thinking it would be a bold statement piece, but the glasses ended up looking classic on my face. I was pleasantly surprised. I think if I wanted to go wild, I would have chosen the amazing Kitty frame. But then there's also the classic Wayfarer frame that tempts me, too. 

What is your favorite sunglass shape for your face? Have you ever deviated from it?

This Mother's Day, I recommend asking for a new pair of sunglasses in a new shape from Lookmatic.   

Celebrating Mother's Day with Girlfriends

that's my pink arse and white napkin on the floor. 

Joanna of Cup and Jo invited me and some friends to a brunch last Saturday to celebrate Mother's Day. Everything about the morning was amazing--the friends (some old and new), the food, the beautiful setting.  I hope it turns into a new tradition! Celebrating motherhood with girlfriends on a beautiful Saturday morning felt just about perfect.

Of course the topic of motherhood came up. It's so easy to find something to talk about regarding motherhood, even with people I've just met. Raising boys and their endless supply of energy was discussed. One mother had twins, so we instantly had something to chat about. Before we started eating, Joanna asked everyone to write a quirky family rule or tradition we had growing up in a Pinhole Press notebook.  I thought of my dad's vegetable rule.

Some nights, but not all, he would declare, "Tonight vegetables are MANDATORY!" We all knew there was no arguing about mandatory veggie night. We better eat up! I don't remember him truly enforcing this rule, but he declared it enough that I still remember it. I've tried proclaiming it with my kids, but it never comes out the same. He had a strength and ironic tone that I just can't seem to match.




I would have had no problem if someone declared mandatory veggie day at the brunch. Find all the recipes here. I wouldn't change a thing--the food was perfect. Especially the dessert (pictured below)!



Top picture from Jamie Beck's post on the event. Other pictures by Karen Mordechai of Sunday Suppers. Click here to see all the pictures she took.  It was so nice to enjoy the breakfast knowing I could snatch these images from other people!

Two more pictures slightly of me after the jump! ha

The Best Way to Enjoy Central Park with Kids: Picnic Lunches

When I lived in CA, I used to pack a bag of food in the morning and head out for the whole day. When lunchtime came, my kids and I had a picnic. It wasn't anything special and it was anywhere. A park bench. On a blanket if I remembered to bring one. Or sometimes it was in my minivan if the weather was lousy. I felt like a show-off when I started packing plates, but it was so much easier to divide the food evenly between the three kids. Picnic lunch days felt like the norm in sunny California.

Then I moved and learned very quickly that picnics are a seasonal activity in NYC. The first winter I lived here, I felt out of whack and insanely jealous when my friends from SF posted their picnics on Facebook. On a cold January day in 2011, without thinking, I made a picnic lunch and tried to have the boys eat it in the stroller outside. They had one mitten on and one off. They used their bare hand to pick up food, but then their fingers got so cold and numb they started dropping the food on the sidewalk. Huge disaster.

At the risk of frost bite and starvation, I knew had to change our lunchtime habits during the winter. Either we started going home for lunch or I'd buy the kids sandwiches at a cafe. I couldn't wait for the temperature to rise so we could get back to picnic lunches again. I didn't realize I'd have to wait until May.

But it's here. Picnic season has officially started. Luckily, yesterday the boys had a half day of school so we could start the month right.

When Red Envelope asked me to select something from their online gift shop, I knew I had to have their Picnic Basket for Four (pictured). I couldn't resist the carafe, cheese board, and adorable mason jar sippers among other things. I even brought the bag on the cruise with me. It's perfect size to stuff a beach towel, a book, and some sunscreen. Another great Mother's Day gift idea. :)

Keep reading to see picnics of our past and some funny outtakes of our picnic yesterday . . .

Happy Mother's Day at 9pm: My Husband's Thoughts on Ella's Birth

that's me and ella on Dec.24, 2005

A couple of years ago, my friend Joanna asked my husband Rob these questions about Ella's birth. It's funny to reread his thoughts about the day we entered parenthood. I should post my answers on Father's Day. Keep reading for the hilarious Q&A . . .

dear diary

Last year at this time I was crying to Liz about moving. I never wanted to leave San Francisco. It was my town. I ADORED it. A year later I find myself ADORING Manhattan. Funny how life works out like that. All that stress I felt and wondering how it was going to all work out? Finding a place to live. Making new friends. Ella's school. I don't even think about it anymore because I love my house, Ella's school, and my new friends. Now I've moved on to the next stresses. Becoming a working mom, working for free, finding time.

I thought having all my kids in school would give me a break. Ha! Does that ever happen? It's always such a let down to find out that each phase of life is just as hard as the last. Well, except for the major phases. Like when my mom died when I was 18. And the first year with twins. And the second year too. Third?

Today is only the second day I've stayed at home since the kids started school full time. Other than that, I've been getting the kids ready, dropping them off at school, going straight to my internship, picking the kids up, coming home, making dinner, putting the kids to bed, and going to bed myself. I went to bed at 8pm last night. I'm tired.

Sometimes I wonder if I had my mom around at times like this she could tell me what to do. Or at least tell me her experiences with working and juggling it all. That's the kind of stuff I forgot to ask her.  I miss her at the most unexpected times. Today, September 20th, 2011. Not Mother's Day, not her birthday or the day she died. Just a quiet Tuesday. It surprises me every time. I like it that way because the longer she's dead, the more I worry that I stopped missing her. But hooray!  I still miss her! I still need her! I hope somehow someway she knows that. That would make me happy.

The Temporary Tattoo Project Supporting Flying Kites

Aren't these temporary tattoos stunning? Robyn Fukumoto contacted me last week and told me about her charity The Temporary Tattoo Project. I was immediately inspired by it. Here's her story:

Basically, my friend Lauren and I were looking for a relevant way to engage our generation in contributing to a great cause, so we created The Temporary Tattoo Project to benefit Flying Kites, a nonprofit out of Greenpoint that runs a school and orphanage in Kenya.  

We collaborated with six top tattoo artists (five from NYC and one from Hawaii) to create temporary tattoos that are being sold to raise money for Flying Kites’ Child Sponsorship Program and Leadership Academy. Each artist was paired with a child in need of sponsorship who inspired limited edition works of art meant to be showcased on your skin.

I'm excited to announce that they are the featured charity on Groupon this week!  I'm encouraging you to check it out and make a donation if you feel inspired, too. Act fast. Their Groupon ends Sunday! Those who donate $10 will receive a free temporary tattoo.

I think you should order one for your sassy mom for Mother's Day, one for your adventurous dad for Father's Day, or one for your wild child's birthday. You could even buy the whole set of six for your favorite badass family!

Discovering cool projects like this makes me happy. Thanks Robyn for contacting me and sending the tattoos. I think what you're doing is fabulous. Good luck!

And one more of Oscar's fierce lion. It was everyone's favorite!

Have a good weekend! I'm soooo ready for it. Rawr. 

Motherhood

*I'm aware that Father's Day is a few days away, and I'm doing what looks like a Mother's Day post.  I'll make up for it somehow. *

Meet Rebecca. She was one of my first friends I made in NYC. Soon after I met her, she blurted out that she was a few weeks pregnant.  Now look at her! She's due any second.  I was honored when she asked me to snap a few pictures during these last few days of her pregnancy. It's such an exhausting task to grow a baby. But look at her strength and beauty and even grace! I certainly wouldn't describe most woman as graceful at this point in their pregnancy, but Rebecca is. Isn't she absolutely lovely?

For this post,  I wanted to find a quote on pregnancy/motherhood that didn't sound like it could be in an overly sentimental Hallmark card. Nothing was right, until I read an excerpt out of Louise Erdrich's memoir: The Blue Jay's Dance. I fell in love with the opening paragraph in Erdrich's book:

Cool quote, right? Good luck Rebecca! The start of another act that rapturously sucks up whole chunks your life is about to begin! Something to look forward to. Ah, it'll be great.

Marathon Training Update: Gaining Perspective

unrelated photo of happiness :)

I've been raising funds to run in the 2012 ING New York City Marathon with Fred's Team.

All the money raised will go to breast cancer research.   

The goal: Raise $3,500 by race day on November 4th. 

Let's get there!

Thank you to everyone who has donated.   

Please join me by donating here!!

It's been a while since I wrote an update about my marathon training. Read my first post to get caught up.  I'm already up to 16 miles on my long runs! The training has been really hard, but running for a charity has given me so much perspective.  Something I didn't always have . . .

My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer for the second time at the beginning of my senior year in high school.  I remember having mix feelings of hope and mystery. Did they catch it early enough? Would she just have to take a few pills? Would she lose her hair this time? It had been 8 years since she last had cancer. What was going to happen to her this time? To our family? Everything is going to be fine, right?

At the time, I was the secretary of my senior class and started to slack off on my duties. The teacher in charge of the student government pulled me into her office shortly after Christmas break. I felt so guilty. I apologized for missing meetings and told her I was going to do better.

She stopped me and said, "Whoa, whoa. Don't worry about it. You're doing fine. Is everything ok with your mother? And those missed meetings, oh please. Just try your best."

I was shocked that she was being so understanding. She wasn't the warm and fuzzy type. And plus I thought I had things to do! The senior class voted for me to take notes during the meetings. To come up with ideas for Prom! The whole system wouldn't work without a secretary!

But it was the way she was looking at me. Waiting for me to say something.  I knew then my mother's illness was more serious than I thought. It's not that my advisor knew more about my mom's cancer than I did, but she had perspective. Something most people lack at 18 years-old. I know I did.

And so each month went by. My mother had chemo. She lost her hair. Her hospital stays started getting longer. I got special permission to visited her in the hospital on my lunch period. Sometimes I would crawl in her bed and snuggle up to her. I must have looked ridiculous, but I missed her too much to care. After a while she would whisper, "It kind-of hurts" and I would feel bad. Then I'd crawl out, tell her I love her, hug her (again! ouch) and drive back to school.

I had English, then art. It's amazing I even went back each day.  But, again, it's perspective. I didn't realize running for the hills was an option. No one would blame me if I did, really, but I kept doing everything as normal as possible. I went to Prom, went to Disney World for Grad Night, and finally graduated.

My mom wasn't able to watch me walk across the stage on graduation day. She was pretty sick by that point and the doctors didn't want her to leave the hospital. Seeing this old picture of me from that day still shocks me. A smile? Really? But I remember being happy. To be with friends and family. To finish high school. To move on.

with my friend Eric

After the official graduation ceremony at my school, my principal reenacted the ceremony at the hospital's church for my mother. It was the last time she would see me accomplish anything. She died a month later.

She never got to see me fly away to college. Hear my first love story with Rob. Watch me get married. Meet my kids and cheer me on through motherhood.  She was such a great cheerleader. The way she waved her arms in the air, wobbled her knees, and hollered is ingrained in my memory. She wasn't one to hold back her emotions, especially when she was happy for someone else.  I would have loved to see her cheering me on during this marathon. She cracked me up.

Which brings me back to perspective. These past few months of training, I've gained perspective on lots of things. For one, it's ok to run for the hills when life gets tough. Literally run for the hills. Either Harlem Hill or Cat Hill in Central Park will do. Sometimes both. It's done great things for me.

But more importantly, I've learned that no one should miss out on their kid's major milestones. Cancer took that away from my mother and so many other parents. We need a cure! I am so excited to help fund the research to find one. Please join me by donating here!

More about Fred's Team: 

100% of the funds raised by Fred's Team go to Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, the nation's preeminent center for research and treatment devoted exclusively to cancer, and at least 80 percent of the total supports pioneering research. 

I specifically choose to raise money for breast cancer. 

When you make an online gift, you will receive an e-mail confirmation and tax acknowledgment as soon as your transaction is complete. For all offline gifts, you will receive a written tax acknowledgment in the mail. 

 More FAQ's here. Like who's this Fred guy?! 

photo credit: Britney Ericksen

NYC Taught Me Fundraiser: Let's Do This Together (Again!)

celebrating my third birthday with my mom.

I did it! On Sunday, I committed to run in the NYC Marathon through a charity that supports cancer research called Fred's Team. Ahhhhh! It felt like the perfect way to celebrate Mother's Day. I'll be running the 26.2 miles in honor of my mother, Cindy. She died of breast cancer on July 3, 2000 in a hospital in southwest Florida. I was 18 years old.

I'm so excited (and a little nervous) to do another charity event on my blog, but why not? You all completely overwhelmed me with your generosity during our first project. Remember when we raised $660 in one weekend? Let's do it again--only this time let's raise a whopping $3,500 by November 4th!

Here's my short term goal: Raise $500 by the end of today. We're almost there, only $78 more to go! Please click here to donate any amount you want. :)

My backyard the night my mom died. 

So why Fred's Team? Why am I running a marathon for a charity? Many reasons. One of them goes back to the night my mother died.

I'll never forget the moment I left the hospital for the last time. The sun was setting as I walked out of the building and onto the hospital parking lot to drive home. The sky stopped me in my tracks. It was bursting with yellows, pinks, and reds. I wanted to believe that she was seeing the same sunset and experiencing the clouds, the sky, and light in a way she was never able to on earth. This made me happy for her. She always told me Florida had the best clouds and tonight, I imagined, they were all hers to enjoy.

I eventually got into my car and started it. REM's album Automatic For The People began to play as it had for the past six months. I had given myself permission to listen to this overly depressing album as many times as I wanted ever since my mom got sick.  Today was no different. I sang and hummed along to the songs as I drove home, eager to find lines I could identify with. See you heaven if you make the list. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. (Of course she made the list!:) I couldn't stop looking at the sky as I drove, the colors kept changing and became more vibrant as the sun finally set.

This drive home gave me a minute to process everything and reflect on my life with my mom. When I finally arrived at my house, I saw my dad and sister in the backyard admiring the sunset too. I joined them and together we talked. It was nice to be with them and feel their love. I took a few pictures of the sunset so I would always remember it.

That night I learned in order to get through this challenging time of my life, I needed to find the perfect balance of solitude and companionship. I needed time to reflect alone, but I also needed my community of friends and family for support.  This lesson has stayed with me ever since and eventually led me to sign up for Fred's Team.

Fred's Team offers that perfect balance I always seek. I'll have moments to reflect on my own as I train for this race. Running is, after all, one of my favorite escapes! But I won't be able to do this alone. I need help from family, friends, the running community and YOU!  If you would like to help, please donate!

Thought you should know:

One hundred percent of the funds raised by Fred's Team go to Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, the nation's preeminent center for research and treatment devoted exclusively to cancer, and at least 80 percent of the total supports pioneering research. I was excited to have the option to specifically choose to raise money for breast cancer. 

When you make an online gift, you will receive an e-mail confirmation and tax acknowledgment as soon as your transaction is complete. For all offline gifts, you will receive a written tax acknowledgment in the mail. 


More FAQ's here. Like who's this Fred guy?!  

Thanks everyone who already donated!! Please join us! 

PS I found this quote. Love it.

“But without deeper reflection one knows from daily life that one exists for other people--first of all for those upon whose smiles and well-being our own happiness is wholly dependent, and then for the many, unknown to us, to whose destinies we are bound by the ties of sympathy.” ― Albert Einstein, Ideas and Opinions

Mother's Day Pictures

Here's two pictures I found of me during the first two years of motherhood. I don't look like her anymore. ha

Get Out There: Open Mic Night

me. and another one of me. aka miss thang. 

When I was in second grade, I asked my crush if he wanted to race at the playground. I hoped it would get his attention. When he said yes, I was stoked. As the race started and I was gaining momentum, I tripped, and crashed my head onto a sewer lid. I got up quickly and he said, "Ew. There's blood dripping." I brushed off the dirt from my hands and knees and acted like it was no big deal. I still can feel the scar where the ER doctor put stitches on my scalp.

Then in high school, I wrote about the experience for a student literary magazine. I ended the piece with something like, "Now I'm about to graduate from high school and my love life hasn't changed since." The teachers creating the journal loved it and asked me to read it at the magazine's launch party.

While I was completely terrified, I loved hearing the reaction of the crowd as I read the last sentence.   Oh unrequited love. Always a hit. I don't remember if I got an award for the piece, but I remember the feeling of walking off stage. I want to do this again, I thought. However, I've never had the motivation. Until now.

The Go Mighty team approached me to create a summer goal to get out there for P&G's Summer Stunner Tour. I can't think of anything else that would get me out there more than to read at an open mic night. I found a venue in the East Village for poets, comedians, singers/musicans, and storytellers. I knew I would be fine when I read it's "a family style restaurant, so NO EXPLICIT LANGUAGE." haha

I'll probably develop something I've written here. Got any favorites? A few I was thinking . . .

Portrait of a Mother
Mother's Day Recap
My Awful Trip Home

If you want to see me, I took a 5 minute slot this Tuesday night, 6:30-11pm at Bareburger. It will truly be for the fun and terror of it all. I promise not to read a poem.

Sponsor info: Become a Summer Stunner! The Color Tour, featuring complimentary salon services with hot P&G products, will be stopping at a retailer near you. Click here for tour dates and more! #SummerStunner

Weekend Approved Project: Let's Do it Together!

Covenant House is a crisis center for kids under the age of 21 who find themselves homeless. It's a safe place to sleep, get a hot meal, and find someone to listen and care for them.  They are allowed to live there for 30 days. I was invited to a baby shower at Covenant House last night. It's the kind of thing I would have never done on my own.  It took an invitation. I'm so glad I got one. It completely changed my mind on the term "homeless". The moms at the shelter were not the ones I see on the street with the signs mumbling and begging for quarters. The moms I met were an energetic, friendly group of woman who are having a rough time establishing themselves. Covenant House is helping them in so many ways!

The baby shower had it all. A dinner, presents, center pieces, balloons, table clothes, a game and, of course, plenty of giggling women. It was even a surprise for the two pregnant girls!  My favorite was baby themed Bingo because all the moms were winners. The Social Worker in charge passed out new baby blankets to everyone in attendance. They cheered! The feeling in the air was light and festive. A lot of the girls asked me to take their picture. One held her baby up high. Another wanted me to take a few of her baby smashing a cake into her face. One requested that my entire blog be pictures of them. Her friends nodded their heads in total agreement. Here you go ladies:

I asked one of the social workers if the moms needed anything. She suggested that they need strollers. I completely understand why. If NYC has taught me one thing, it's that trying to get around the city without a stroller is extremely difficult. I consider my stroller my tiny minivan. I don't go anywhere without it--and my kids are almost all over the age of four! City mamas use their strollers forever! The worker pointed out one of the mothers who has a little one, with one on the way. A stroller would make this young mom's life so much easier.

So let's do it! Let's all donate a little money for strollers!  Call it the NYC Taught Me Mother's Need Strollers Fund!  I set up a paypal account. It's located on the bottom of this post. Deadline is Monday night (August 15th).  I'll keep you posted on donations throughout the weekend here. Yay!

Here's to my most ambitious weekend approved project yet. I'm excited to see the results of our joint project. :) I created a new page on the top left to show our progress. Thank you Emily for being the first person to donate!


(POST EDIT: My fundraiser is over, but if you would like to donate directly to Covenant House, you can do so here.)

More about my experience at Convenant House below:

After the baby shower, I got a tour of the facility and learned more about this particular branch of Covenant House. This facility only serves woman under the age of 21 who are either pregnant or already mothers. They are a loud to stay for 30 days.  Each bedroom is shared by 2 mothers and their kids. Two of the girls graciously let me see into their room. There was just enough room for two twin beds for the mothers and two cribs for their babies. The room was neat and clean, albeit small. A small airconditioner was buzzing in the window. The mother's had a shared bathroom with another set of girls in a conjoining room. The building also has a childcare center, a roof deck with an amazing view, a computer room and a small living room. In their 30 day stay, they have access to proper health care, job training classes, and full time childcare. They also receive help on obtaining long-term housing, getting employment, parenting skills.

The experience was great! Let's see how we can help! Just an FYI: This is not a sponsored post. They contacted me to spread awareness of their organization. I fell in love with what they are doing and agreed to write this post. I'm not getting compensated for anything. :)