Hi! In October 2010, I moved from San Francisco to Manhattan with my husband, daughter, and twin boys. Since then I've been busy teaching myself and my kids how to hail a cab, fly a kite in Central Park, and walk across the Brooklyn Bridge with style. And a few other things. I write about those other things here. Thanks for stopping by!
Email questions to sharonbeesley@gmail.com.
I took pictures of people other than my kids at my photography class last week! I was petrified, especially because I never met the models before the shoot. Totally unfamiliar people. I started off by over compensating and acting like a fool during the first 50-100 shots. This guy (below) got the worst of it.
As soon as he looked into my camera, I would giggle and say something stupid like, "Oh wow. Uh, teacher? What happens if you fall instantly in love with the subject?" Yeah, those kinds of questions, while silly, just made it worse for me. The thing is, I've never concentrated on a man's eyes so intensely besides my husband's. It felt so intimate in my camera lens, but totally wasn't, of course. He was modeling! Ha. It was all very new to me and at this point, I wanted to go home. But I learned my first lesson regardless:
Tip #1 When Shooting People:
Flatter your subject, but don't profess you love for the model.
Especially if you're a happily married woman!
I decided to move onto the next set of models (below). I don't think I could have ask for a more willing or beautiful couple to shoot. Still, I wasn't feeling comfortable. As gorgeous as they are in real life, it's a lot of responsibility to make them look as good on camera. They were trying so hard to be accommodating, I was trying so hard to move my F/stop and shutter speeds gracefully without a confused look on my face. I was still doubting myself and doing a lot of nervous laughing. But I was getting better and learned my second lesson:
Tip #2 When Shooting People:
It will get better for everyone ten minutes into the shoot.
And then, right as we were going to lose all our light, I started taking pictures of this beautiful woman who is due any day. She's a dancer at Julliard with grace and style. It's she lovely? When I got to her, I finally stopped worrying if every setting in my camera was perfect. It wasn't, of course, but I realized it didn't have to be. I'm a newbie after all. Sometimes I go into situations with unrealistic expectations. I'm not a professional photographer and I don't really think I want to be one. There's still that part of me that wants to do everything well (perfectionists unite!) and then my nerves get the best of me. As soon as I started just having fun with it, however, that's when I get the best results.
Tip #3 When Shooting People:
Be Cool.
That's the end of my photography class. I learned so much! What are your tips for taking photos of people?
Aren't these temporary tattoos stunning? Robyn Fukumoto contacted me last week and told me about her charity The Temporary Tattoo Project. I was immediately inspired by it. Here's her story:
Basically, my friend Lauren and I were looking for a relevant way to engage our generation in contributing to a great cause, so we created The Temporary Tattoo Project to benefit Flying Kites, a nonprofit out of Greenpoint that runs a school and orphanage in Kenya.
We collaborated with six top tattoo artists (five from NYC and one from Hawaii) to create temporary tattoos that are being sold to raise money for Flying Kites’ Child Sponsorship Program and Leadership Academy. Each artist was paired with a child in need of sponsorship who inspired limited edition works of art meant to be showcased on your skin.
I'm excited to announce that they are the featured charity on Groupon this week! I'm encouraging you to check it out and make a donation if you feel inspired, too. Act fast. Their Groupon ends Sunday! Those who donate $10 will receive a free temporary tattoo.
I think you should order one for your sassy mom for Mother's Day, one for your adventurous dad for Father's Day, or one for your wild child's birthday. You could even buy the whole set of six for your favorite badass family!
Discovering cool projects like this makes me happy. Thanks Robyn for contacting me and sending the tattoos. I think what you're doing is fabulous. Good luck!
And one more of Oscar's fierce lion. It was everyone's favorite!
Have a good weekend! I'm soooo ready for it. Rawr.
Miss Mamie's Spoonbread Too is one of the few restaurants we are repeat costumers. Every time I've gone, I feel like I'm eating home cooked food. Such a rarity. I get so disappointed when restaurant food tastes too sterile or too exotic. But not here, they nail it. Soul food at its best! It really shouldn't be any other way. Here's her cookbook if you can't make it to NYC!
We've order just about every fried thing on the Miss Mamie's menu. The fried catfish and chicken are my favorite with collard greens and sweet potatoes on the side. Nothing like that on a sunny NYC day, cold or hot. Just don't ask the waitress to take your picture!
Cracked me up when I saw this. I forgot to put the auto focus on for her. I like it anyway.
I've been spreading the day we went to Miss Mamie's over a couple of posts. We started off at the Conservatory Garden in Central Park, headed north toward Harlem Meer, and then west to Miss Mamie's. Fun day in retrospect! Enjoy the map that looks like a kid made it! I would love to blame Ella, but I can't. More of my dazzling graphic skills to come.
Do you have a restaurant you adore and go back to often? Miss Mamie's is ours! Does 5 times count?
Good Morning! Here's some good news to start your Wednesday: KK Children Designs is giving away an organic dress to one of my lucky readers!
I adore KK Children Designs use of bold bright patterns against a simply constructed dress. It creates the perfect balance. They have a special line of dresses made out of organic cotton knit, that is not only eco-friendly, but adorable! It's amazing that those bright colors come from water-based pigment inks on natural fiber textiles. No additional chemicals are used in the printing or preparation process.
Each dress is hand cut and is matched with 2 over sized buttons that are hand sewed onto the dress. No two dresses are exactly alike! However, each one will be very similar. They currently have 9 organic dresses in shop. My favorites are the Bloom in Ruby $62 (above) and Love Tree $62 (below).
Entering is easy! Visit KK Children Designs, pick out your favorite organic dress, and write the name of it in the comments section below. A winner will be chosen at random on Thursday. Good luck!
We recently went to a Giants/Mets baseball game on a whim. Mostly because it sounded fun, but also because my husband Rob loves sports (Go Giants! Warriors! 49ers!). I was shocked when I found that out when I first met him. My family didn't watch professional sports on TV growing up, and I never dated a guy who liked professional sports. I honestly thought sport fans were weird and dull. I used to think all that money and all the hype was such a waste. But Rob changed that for me.
I always tell people, watch one game with my husband, and you'll see sports aren't lame after all. Maybe it's because I love him to death, but he showed me that sports aren't for just for morons. They actually have some substance. Not that I'll ever watch a game by myself, but when I'm with him, he really makes it exciting and worthwhile. His enthusiasm is contagious.
Sometimes I get so frustrated when people dismiss sports fans as weird and dull even though I totally used to be one of them. The worst is when people make snide remarks. Makes me want to throw a Superbowl party and force them to come!
So when he proposed that we go to a Mets game, I was excited! It's a classic NYC activity. It wouldn't feel right if I lived here much longer and missed out on a professional sporting event. While we were there, Ella and Rob really bonded over the game. It was so cute to watch him explain the rules to her. I loved hearing her say, "Oh, so it's not a point, it's a run?" They cheered. They booed. Even when she got bored, she drew a picture of the baseball field. Such a sweetheart.
The boys, on the other hand, got antsy quickly. I took Owen around the entire stadium once. Then I picked up Oscar and did the same with him. They were stoked to get some one on one time for a change. We were also lucky the stadium was practically empty so the boys could run up and down the aisles without bugging anyone.
After a while, I got antsy too. I was happy to be the food runner. The bathroom runner. The photographer. I did sing my heart out to Take Me Out the The Ball Game. Love that part!
I'm shocked we lasted the whole game. Rob must have really worked his sports fan magic on my kids. Like I said, all it takes is one game!
PS Owen really wanted for me to buy him something, but I couldn't figure out what it was. Finally, I asked him to draw it for me (above). Can you guess what it is?
Below are more pictures of Owen. He's so happy when he's free to do whatever he wants.
Have you seen a professional sport recently? Like it or hate it?
I joined Ella and her class on a field trip to the Bronx Zoo on Friday. It was my first time experiencing field trips as a chaperone. Ella was so excited to have me join her, she woke up early and everything. I love having such a big fan. I hope it lasts!
I was kind of nervous to join her class. What would be my responsibilities? Would I have a group to my own? Luckily, the day was totally smooth and enjoyable. I have her lead teacher to thank for that. I could tell that she has the kids on a solid routine, because even on a day when everything is thrown off, the kids remained cool. Even so, I was exhausted at the end of the day. And I forgot: school buses are so bouncy! Imagine driving one in NYC? Scary!
My favorite part of the day was watching Ella's class walk two by two, holding hands everywhere they went. Skipping together. Pointing out things to their partner. Made my heart melt. Most of the pairs are boy/girl, and they didn't think anything of it. I wonder if this is the last year. When do things get awkward between boys and girls? Everyone in Ella's class was completely oblivious! Ella's partner is so sweet. He offered to hold her red lunch box the whole time.
I adore her class and joining her on this trip confirmed that she's getting a really good education. Her two teachers are great, her class has a really good chemistry, and they have access to so many amazing opportunities in the city. Ignore everything you read/watch/hear about the NYC public school education system. My experience has been anything but amazing for her.
What are the public schools like where you live? Do they get a bad wrap, too? Deserved or undeserved?
I always feel lost in a sea of women's clothes and accessories. There's too many choices and I second guess my judgement. For good reason: There's always something better out there! My dad used to joke around with me and say that every time we went shopping. It cracked me up, but at the same time it's so true! Making a dorky senseless purchase that I'll later regret haunts me.
Though, this time I think I actually got the best things out there. I've been wearing all four items for the past three days and feel good every time. My plan is to exhaust these accessories until they shred into tiny unwearable pieces of dust. ;)
Bag (I bought mine at Loehmanns in black and white for over 40% off. They also had the red one too. )
I found the picture on the left of me and my mom while I was cleaning this afternoon. I'm about the same age my kids are now. I tried to recreate the picture with Oscar when I picked him up for school, but it didn't really work. I'm overly stylized, and he's not enthused. It lacks the spontaneity and seems over thought compared to the original. But there's something about posing with my kids like this.
It's not a pose professional photographers use, yet it's one of my favorites. Cheek to cheek. I've always loved walking around the house, holding my kids tight against my face. Their skin so soft. Their cheeks so bouncy. Nothing like it. It's such a weird sign of endearment, but one of my favorite parts about motherhood.
My mother died five years before I started having kids. I never had the chance to directly ask her about her favorite parts of motherhood. Seeing this picture shows me we share the same joy. Cheeks! I like to think it's something I learned from her.
What's one of your favorite part about motherhood?
Remember a few weeks ago when I checked the Conservatory Garden for signs of spring (here)? I went back on Saturday and wasn't disappointed. Everything is in full bloom. Oscar declared he is going to marry Violet in this garden. I thought it was so sweet that a four-year old is already planning his wedding. He's such a romantic. I hope he doesn't get his heart broken too many times.
While the tulips were gorgeous this year, I have to say I liked them better last year. Everyone's blaming it on the unusual warm winter and spring. Has your garden been affected by the heat too?
Oscar is baby A. Owen is baby B. Can you kind of see it?
Last week, I got a two letters from readers who just found out their pregnant with identical twins. What are the chances? One reader already has three kids, the other reader has an 18th month old daughter.
Congratulations!
Now stop reading scary internet stories about identical twins!
While there are a ton of risks, there's also the chance you can have a boring smooth pregnancy. I was lucky to have one! Here's my story.
I was 25 years old, and Ella was 18th months old. I decided to stop breast feeding her at that time. A month later I got pregnant. Whoops.
The biggest challenge I had early on (before I knew I had twins) was that I was really tired. I slept around 12 hrs a day. I was working from home full-time, and had the luxury to quit when I became absolutely useless. Not only was I tired, but my brain stopped functioning. Writing a simple email took all my concentration. My husband thought I might have depression, but I assured him it wasn't. I was happy, tired and dumb!
I should have known something might be up. I was able to work full-time when I was pregnant with Ella, so I was confused why this one felt so different. That, and I was HUGE. I remember going to a baby shower when I was 18 weeks pregnant and sitting in between two women that were due in a few weeks. My belly was as big as theirs. I didn't think much of that either. I thought I was having one of those warped body image issues people tend to have.
When I got home, I asked Rob, "No, really, don't I look big?" I turned from the front, then the side pushing my belly out really far. Talk about a tough spot for a husband. He surprisingly handled himself really well. Instead of being his overly honest self, he convinced me I looked great and not to worry about it. Ha!
Confession: I didn't go to the doctor until I was 14 weeks pregnant, and I didn't find out I had twins until I was 20 weeks pregnant. Rob was transitioning to a new job and I didn't want to get trapped filling out paperwork twice. Looking back, I shouldn't have been so lazy, but it felt right at the time. Other than being tired and stupid, the pregnancy felt normal to me.
I like to think that for the most part, things usually end up on the majority. Most pregnancies aren't twins. Most pregnancies for healthy 25 year-old-woman are smooth. Most of the time, the things I worry about, never end up happening. So I coasted right through the first 14 weeks.
As soon as my doctor heard a heartbeat at my 14 week check-up, she moved on to other patients. I guess it's not in their job requirement to look for more. Noted. My next appointment was for my 20-week ultra sound at another office. We couldn't wait to see if we were having a boy or a girl! I had a feeling I was having a boy. I would have been shocked if my prediction was wrong.
It was a Friday afternoon. Ella and Rob came with me to the appointment. The technician put the jelly on my belly, then placed the transducer (the camera thing) right in middle of my stomach. As soon as he put it on, he looked at the monitor and pulled the transducer off my belly. It was as if he had seen Bigfoot. He waited a second, looked over the notes, then asked:
"Have you guys had an ultrasound yet?"
"Nooo."
"So you guys don't know anything about this pregnancy?"
"Nooo, why?" Scared.
"Oh, you're having twins!"
That's when I had a moment of hysterics. Laughing, crying, calm, the whole bit. Part of me felt peace of mind for quiting my job. Even up until this point, I had felt like such a loser! I couldn't wait to email my old boss! Also, I was grateful I found out so late because I had less time to worry about all the potential risks.
The technician observed that Oscar had slightly more fluid than Owen. This happens a lot with identical twins--one of the babes starts taking up all of the fluid. It's not good. I worried all weekend about it. On Monday morning I called and made an appointment with a twin specialist to give it another look. I needed to know. He took another look that day and assured me everything looked fine and not to worry.
From then on I had an ultrasound every week. I think. During the last few weeks, the twin specialist called me a Baby Making Machine. I was so flattered.
Look! Accidental Chevron Stripes! I was sooo ahead of the times.
Eventually, I walked right into my C-section appointment at the hospital at 36 weeks. My doctors wanted to make sure the babes got out with the least amount of drama because I only had one placenta (typical of identical twins).
They were huge--Oscar was 6 pounds 6 ounces, and Owen was 6 pounds 3 ounces. Even being 4 weeks early, they didn't spend anytime in NICU. We went home with them easily from the hospital. Here's a cheesy and overly sentimental movie Rob and I made of their birth. Enjoy!
Thanks to my two readers for inspiring me to remember this crazy time of my life. Good luck!
FYI: We're done growing our family. It feels good to move to the next phase of our life.
Here's a picture I took of my belly the night before I had the boys. My face says it all. After the jump.
i've always loved this picture of me and Ella. Taken almost 7 years ago. We both look so much different now.
I've been really sick these last few days. Sore throat from hell. Totally ruined all my spring break plans for the kids. I feel horrible that they've been cooped up for 2 days, going on 3. I forced myself out of the house yesterday. Their heads were about to explode if they didn't get some fresh air. Living in a tiny apartment isn't so bad, except for times like this. We're steps away from the best parks and museums, but sometimes we have to pay the price for that.
While I rest, the kids have been watching a lot of TV. But now on day 3, they have been finding other things to do. Currently, they are playing in our endless hallway with a long green ribbon. Don't know exactly what the game is, but Ella seems to have a lot of rules for it. "Clap, jump, turn around. That's how you do it! Or do you want stomp? Break! Time out! Time out!" She's giving out her left over Easter candy to the winner.
Besides making up games, Ella has also been busy writing on her private blog. Here's some of my favorite posts:
Once she got to move up from 1st to the 2nd grade for the day:
Last thursday I went to 2nd grade It was fun . I made new friends .But this kid called David he was mad he thought that he can do whatever he wanted the teacher got mad so he did not get centers he got so mad that he said I will be good the teacher said okay but he lied he pushed somebody he got really hurt so he did not have centers he got bad the teacher said that is A lesson.
When it was moms brthiy we went to a fennsy reashtrot we ate cupcakes and sinwishes and we pinted our nels and we put macup on. I wade a red dress it had 2 pucess. and it was just the 2 of us .we had so munsh fun.And when we got home we had chokelt cake it was kind of like brownnys.
today went to 2 boots. I ate a cookie it was chocolate chip I taste a bite I like it. but I like it butter. the girl scouts cookies are way butter. and I also had pizza. it was so good it is like the big apple. that is the best pizza in the would . so that is why you have to go to NYC. and for breakfast I had a bagel and they have the best bagel in the would so that is also why you have to come to NYC.
Do your kids have blogs? My favorite is when she says, "It's so weird, mom. Your keyboard doesn't have the letter "v"!" And then I have to show her it actually does. "Oh, there it is!"
Hope you have a great weekend! Don't get sick! Wash your hands after reading this post.
Last Thursday, I found a beautiful copy of Huckleberry Finn on sale at Anthropologie. It's not there anymore, but I found the same copy at Amazon. I was planning on waiting to give it to the boys for their birthday. I've never read it before, but I knew it was a classic story about a boy getting into a lot of mischief. A perfect gift for Oscar and Owen. Especially Owen.
I had the Anthro bag hanging on my closet door knob and had forgotten about it. Then, last night, Oscar took the book from the bag and said, "What's this?" It was wrapped in tissue paper just like a present (thanks Angela!). I was sick all day, and so the kids had been cooped up in the house (it's spring break). I figured since we weren't going to get out of the house, we might as well as read about an adventure.
As I starting read it, I remembered Huckleberry Finn is always on the banned booked list. And I can kind-of see why. In the first chapter, it talks fondly about smoking and uses the "n-word" about forty times. I couldn't even say it (censorship!), so I replaced it "slave". Reason is, I don't want my four year old using it unknowingly.
As I continued reading the book, I starting thinking about this article I read in New York Family by Eric Messinger. He wrote about his decision to let his 11-year old daughter watch the Hunger Games. She had enjoyed the books and had been planning for weeks to watch the movie with friends. Eric knew the movie was going to be violent (the plot is about a televised fight to the death between kids!), but believes "kids handle information that works for them". I agree. He concludes the article by writing:
I checked in with her about seeing The Hunger Games, and she didn’t think it was such a big deal and that she could always turn away at parts that seemed too violent—and she was really looking forward to seeing it with her friends.
Rather than question her about its post-apocalyptic vision, I left the conversation there.
Maybe some of the content in Huckleberry Finn is not be age appropriate for my kids. I'm just banking on the fact that they will look forward to spending time together and everything else (racism, trouble making, smoking, etc) will go over their heads. More than anything, Owen has been more annoyed that I was reading it with a southern accent. He kept saying, "Can you stop saying it like that? Why are you talking like that? Stop, mom! Read normal." I ignored him.
Ever see this Lewis CK bit about Huckleberry Finn? So funny. It has tons of profanity, racist language, and makes reference to a lewd act. Mark Twain would be proud.
April marks my one year membership to the New York Botanical Garden. I bought a Family Membership on a whim last spring break. I blame it on love at first sight. I've probably been back around 7 times and with each visit, I've seen something new. Each season brings new blooms, new smells and new exhibits on it's 250 exquisite acres. Here's my experience over the different seasons:
If you go, I recommend walking through the Conservatory first, then take the 30 minute tram ride around the gardens, and (if you have kids) finish up at the Children's Adventure Garden. That makes for a perfect day.
I also recommend taking the tram and getting off at a random stop. I've done this twice and both times I felt like I was dropped off in my own private backyard garden. It sounds over dramatic, I know, but it really is amazing. Mostly because it's quite. Maybe I'll see another family or two, but they aren't stepping on my toes. That's what draws me all the way to the Bronx every time. Manhattan can be so suffocating!
The only time the NYBG felt congested was during the Holiday Train Show, but it was worth it. It reminded me of the elaborate model train displays my dad used to set up in our living room at Christmastime. I'm sure if I went earlier in the season, the Train Show wouldn't feel so packed. It's just that this year I waited until the last minute.
Below are the pictures of Monday's trip to the garden. We started off at the Orchid Show, and then took to the tram to the Family Garden. It didn't open until 1pm, so we played amongst the Flowering Cherries while we waited. There was a lot of wild flower picking, headstands and barefoot running going on.
Thank you Rikshaw Design for outfitting Ella in this seahorse sundress! Isn't it sweet? Ella picked it! Soft, comfortable, and vibrant. The perfect dress to wear to a garden. Their anchor sundress is super cute, too. I love Rikshaw's use of block printing. Gives it that imperfectly perfect look I adore.
My favorite crafts are ridiculously simple and encourage imagination. In the past I've shamelessly promoted foil sculptures, toilet paper maracas, even a block of ICE. Now I'm here to present the latest easiest art project ever: The Stickman. We did this one at The NY Botanical Garden yesterday. They always have the best projects. Owen decided to complicate things by making his a Three Eyed Stickman. Odd yet wonderful. I like it.
What are your kid's favorite super easy activities? Coloring in a coloring book? Paper Airplanes? Cartwheels?
On Saturday, we got invited to an amazing Easter Egg Hunt and Picnic hosted by my friend Lesley. She found the perfect location in Central Park (map). It's crazy that I've lived in NYC for over a year and never spent anytime here at the The Pool. I must have ran past it, but never noticed it. The pond, the willow trees, the perfect weather, the grassy fields--it all felt out of a movie set. It's hard to imagine that these pictures were taken smack dab in the middle of Manhattan.
When we arrived, my family sat down on a blanket and ate a simple picnic of cheese, bread, and grapes. I forgot drinks so Rob had to run off to the store and buy some. He came back with more meat, these cookies, and a few drinks. Eventually more people arrived, and we were surrounded by friends.
Most of the women there were also in my photography class and so we compared settings. What F/Stop are you using? Shutter speed? One of my friends confessed that she put her camera on automatic mode during the hunt. I actually should have done the same. I missed out on a lot of shots because I forgot to check my settings. Whoops. I got a few that turned out. It will be interesting to see their pictures of the day. Actually, I can't wait!
There were around 40 kids involved in the hunt, so Lesley thought of a simple way to give everyone a fair chance of getting eggs. She gave each child a color coded bracelet before the hunt. Kids ages 2-3 got yellow bracelets, 3-4 year olds got green, 4-5 blue, 6+ orange. As soon as their color was called, they were aloud to start the hunt, like a tiered entry. It gave the younger kids more time to find eggs with out getting run over by the big kids. The older kids didn't have to wait long, just around 30 seconds between each group. Eventually, all the kids were out looking together and everyone got plenty of eggs. From what I could see, it was a success.
After all the eggs were found, Lesley hid a few eggs just for kids ages 2 and under. So sweet to watch the babies have their own little hunt.
But it wasn't just the super organized hunt that made this event special. It was the surprises like the "feed the ducks" bags made by Lesley, the AMAZING three layered cake by Pete The Mighty Baker, and the beautiful pinata made by Heidi. These things made the day feel so magical.
Can you believe Pete is a self taught baker? Pricing/flavors/gallery here.
I'm starting to forget Owen's tantrum about the empty water bottle. I'm starting to forgive Oscar for refusing to take a family photo because wanted to wait in line for face painting. I already think it's funny when Ella's hat few in the water, annoying as it was at the time to get it out. Tantrums and all, I would relive Saturday over again. It was just about flawless.
Hope you had a great weekend, too! More pictures/outtakes (12 total) after the jump. Enjoy!
